Category Archives: Lyrics and Thoughts

(My) Psychology of Frozen

Note: I’m no psychologist, this post simply goes deeper in the movie and takes an in depth look at the characters and songs. These thoughts and insights are my own and based on my own life experiences. If you haven’t seen the movie yet, see it, then read this, for there are spoilers! 

Bravo Disney. Bravo for making a movie with such a powerful message that anyone in the world can relate to. Bravo for making the main antagonist actually be the protagonist. Frozen is, in one word, a masterpiece. Not only are the songs carefully crafted and thoughtfully written and scored, but the characters are also warm, loving and memorable. Frozen speaks to all of us. As adults, we can all attest that we are our own worst enemy. We all have dealt with the inexplicable power of fear holding us back in our lives. Some of us have learned to overcome; others are in a daily battle.  We can all learn many life-changing lessons from Frozen, and most of these lessons come from the brilliant songs themselves.

Frozen Heart

After the chanting of an angelic choir, the scene opens with ice, naturally. Men in the icing business are cutting through the ice with saws, and the opening song begins.

Born of cold and winter air and mountain rain combining
This icy force both foul and fair has a frozen heart worth mining

So cut through the heart, cold and clear
Strike for love and strike for fear,

There’s beauty and there’s danger here
Split the ice apart. Beware the frozen heart.

This song is a precedent for the entire movie. Once you’ve seen the movie, you understand that the ice they are referring to symbolizes all of our hearts. We are capable of being both “foul and fair” but we all have frozen hearts that are worth mining. These men are doing hard labor, in the freezing cold, commenting on how powerful a force ice is, but that even though it’s challenging, it is worth it. In the movie, one of the main characters, Elsa, has a frozen heart.  She was born with magical powers that lets her control ice, but this is not the reason her heart is frozen. This song is a beautiful allegory of someone trying to love a damaged soul.  For the person who is trying to show someone their love, they need be aware of this: striking through the frozen heart is no easy feat.  When attempting to break the frozen heart, you can only strike with love. That is the only way to thaw a frozen heart. A lot of us have frozen hearts. We don’t believe that anyone could truly love us that much. We fear rejection and betrayal.  In the process, we toughen up and build a wall, thick enough that someone would need to strike it with an ax to get through to us.  Not everyone in life sees our worth either. Most people would not bother trying to thaw your frozen heart. It’s a scary thing. It requires work, patience, suffering, frustration, and most importantly, love.

Do you want to build a snowman?

This song follows Elsa and Anna after the incident where Elsa strikes Anna on the head with ice. Since it is her brain (which can be easily swayed) and not her heart, Anna survives. The memory of Elsa’s powers, however, has been erased by Papa Troll. Throughout the song, we see Anna continuously beg her sister to let her in, to open the door, to simply tell her what’s going on. Year after year, Elsa repeatedly rejects her sister and ignores her pleas to have a relationship with her.  How many times in your life have you shut the door on the people who were trying to have relationship with you? How many times have you let fear hold you back from revealing who you really are to others?  In this scene, we see that her parents encouraged her to “conceal” her power, to “not feel it.” Many of us have had this outer influence in our lives, where people closest to us tried to contain the person we really are.  Either they didn’t know how to teach you to live to your fullest potential or they served as a barrier, telling you that you would never be good enough or that you didn’t have it in you. They let their own fears dictate their actions and in the process failed to let you become the person you were meant to be.  Elsa, from the time she was a little girl to a young woman, shut herself from the real world, scared of rejection, betrayal, and mostly herself and her potential.

For the first time in forever

In this scene, we see Anna as a grown young woman, excited for Coronation Day, mostly because this means she can meet “actual real life people”. She suffered through the tragedy of losing both her parents yet still maintains a joyous spirit, eager to see the good in life and all of the great things it can offer. She is the opposite of Elsa, who sees the world as a dangerous place, where people can’t be trusted and she cannot be free to be herself.  Anna, on the other hand, can’t wait to meet people and is thrilled at the possibility of meeting “the one” and living happily ever after. She is optimistic about her future, not letting her past hold her back from experiencing life. Before she asks for the gates to be opened, Elsa has a little talk with herself, repeating the same words her father told her as a child:

“Don’t let them in, don’t let them see, be the good girl you always have to be. Conceal. Don’t feel. Put on a show. Make one wrong move and everyone will know.”

Elsa was robbed of feeling as hopeful and optimistic about life as Anna, as she was told at a young age that she needed to hide who she really was.  As a result, she now lives in fear, with her father’s voice in her head, letting his legacy live on by trying to be a good girl and not let the world see who his daughter really is. A lot of us can relate to this as well. We live each day trying to live to the standard of our parents, even if their actions were questionable.  Right or wrong, subconsciously or not, we act out little things here and there that are reminiscent of our parent’s behavior.

Love is an open door

This song is a perfect reminder to us that love is supposed to be an open door. What does this mean exactly?  Vulnerability. It’s very easy to slam doors and stay cooped inside the comfort of your own little world. The most difficult part is leaving your door open, trusting that the person who is going to enter the safety of you world is not going to destroy it by betraying you.  In order to leave the door open to people in your life you need to be able to trust them.  You also need to be able to trust in yourself, trust that you are fully capable of letting someone in because you ARE worth it.  Elsa kept her door shut because she didn’t trust the people on the outside, nor did she trust herself. Her fear held her back from letting others in.  Let’s all remember that life and love are supposed to be open doors. We gain nothing from keeping them shut. Take a breath, believe in yourself, and take a chance by opening your own door.

Let it Go

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight, not a foot print to be seen.
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I’m the queen.

The wind is howling like the swirling storm inside
Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I tried.

Don’t let them in, don’t let them see
Be the good girl you always have to be

Conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know
Well know they know

Let it go, let it go
Can’t hold it back anymore,

Let it go, let it go,
Turn away and slam the door

I don’t care what they’re going to say
Let the storm rage on.

The cold never bothered me anyway.
It’s funny how some distance

Makes everything seem small
And the fear that once controlled me

Can’t get to me at all
It’s time to see what I can do

To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me

I’m free.
Let it go, let it go

I am one with the wind and sky
Let it go, let it go,

You’ll never see me cry
Here I stand and here I’ll stay

Let the storm rage on
My power flurries through the air into the ground

My soul is spiraling in frozen fractals all around
And one thought crystallizes like an icy blast

I’m never going back, the past is in the past
Let it go, let it go,

And I’ll rise like the break of dawn,
Let it go, let it go,

The perfect girl is gone
Here I stand

In the light of day,
Let the storm rage on

The cold never bothered me anyway.

FrozenElsa has left her parent’s castle and experiences life for the first time completely free.  With nobody around, just the mountains of snow in front of her, she feels safe.  She’s letting go of the past, of her parents and their idealizations and expectations of her. It’s time for her to start living to her fullest potential and to see what she’s capable of. What’s so wonderful with this song is that all of us can interpret it in the way that relates to our life story. We all have something that we need to let go. We all know that we need to embrace our full potential, not let the past overshadow or predict the future, and realize our identity apart from our parents.  Towards the end of the song, when she realizes “the past is in the past”, with one hand she releases her tightly-wound bun, to expose a long beautiful braid and with the other, tousles her hair to be less constricted. She changes her castle clothes to reflect a stunning frozen-themed dress with icicle sequins that represents her true identity. Her walk is confident as she approaches the light of day. Seeing hope and peace in her future, she is truly beautiful.  This is the same for all of us. We become a different person when we let go whatever it is that is not helping us progress in life and see life in an optimistic way.  We become the most beautiful version of ourselves when we let go of our fears and live to our potential.  At the same time, it’s interesting how she admits that she is the queen of an isolated kingdom. She understands that she is going to live a life in solitary and seems okay with it. Why? Because she has lived this way her whole life. She was isolated in her parent’s castle and she is isolating herself now, the only difference is no one is there to tell her what she can or cannot do.  While it is wonderful that she is living to her potential and letting go of all her fear, this is not and should not be the final step in her journey (or ours).  And this is exactly why this song isn’t the end of the movie.

For the first time in forever (reprise)

Anna finally reaches Elsa’s gorgeous frozen castle, and is surprised that for the first time that Elsa’s door isn’t locked. Hesitantly, Anna walks in and gazes in admiration of all that her sister is capable of. Her frozen castle is breathtakingly beautiful.  Elsa shyly approaches, but you can tell she is excited for her sister to see the new her, how beautiful she looks after letting go of her fear and being true to herself.  Anna notices how “different” she looks, and proceeds to tell her to come back home.  Elsa, still fearful, tells her no and begins to walk away. Anna sings to her:

Please don’ t shut me out again
Please don’t slam the door

You don’t have to keep your distance anymore
Cause for the first time in forever, I finally understand

For the first time in forever we can fix this hand in hand
We can head down the mountain together

You don’t have to live in fear
Cause for the first time in forever,

I will be right here.

Anna is trying desperately to convince her sister that she doesn’t have to shut her out anymore. She is proving to Elsa that there is another human being out there who loves her and accepts her for who she is. Even though there is a consequence from her sister’s actions (eternal winter), Anna is willing to help her figure it out. Elsa is given the option to trust that someone will not betray her, and trust herself that her own powers won’t hurt Anna again.  Elsa takes the easy way out, telling her to go back home, to stay away so she can be safe from her. Anna refuses to accept this answer, and tries again to convince her sister that they can face this challenge together.  All her positivity and hope drives Elsa mad for a moment as her final words are a definitive “I CAN’T”. With the realization that her fear is very much still a part of her, she loses control of her power, accidentally striking Anna’s heart with ice.  Take home lesson: other people, not just you, get hurt when you shut them out, and if you live your whole life with the mentality of “I can’t’”, horrible consequences will ensue.

Fixer Upper

Kristoff, similar to Elsa, has lived his life in isolation and the only other living thing he can trust is his pet reindeer.  His troll family explains this to Anna (mistaking her as his girlfriend), that although he lives his life isolated, it’s confirmation of his “desperation for human hugs.”  He’s a fixer upper, and the only thing that can fix a fixer upper is true love.  Mamma troll explains to Anna:

“We’re not saying you can change him cause people don’t really change.
We’re only saying love’s a force that’s powerful and strange.

People make bad choices when they’re mad or scared or stressed
But throw a little love their way…. And you’ll bring out their best. True love brings out the best!

Everyone’s a bit of a fixer upper, that’s what it’s all about!
Father! Sister! Brother! We need each other, to raise us up and round us out.

Everyone’s a bit of a fixer upper, but when push comes to shove
The only fixer-upper fixer that can fix up a fixer-upper is

True true true true true true true love
True love, love, love, love, love, love!

In case you missed it, the answer is…. Love! Truth is we are all messed up. Every single one of us. We all need fixing, and the only thing to fix us is true love.  Papa troll tells Anna that she will die unless she finds true love to thaw her frozen heart. At first they assume this means a true love kiss, but as the movie ends, we discover a different story. Are we humans even capable of “true love?”  What does it even mean? As Anna finds out, true love means sacrificing her own life for her sister, which is a beautiful image to what Jesus did on the cross for us. He gave up his life, went through unbearable pain and suffering to give us life. He is the very definition of love. Only once Elsa realizes this act of true love from her sister was she able to let go of all her anxiety and fear. Only true love can thaw a frozen heart.  Seeing this kind of love for the first time, Elsa knows how to unthaw the city. Letting go of her fears (for good this time) and replacing it with love, Elsa now has the power to restore Arendelle to its beautiful summer-like state.  The gates will never be closed again and she and her sister can finally have the relationship they missed out on for all those years.

Which character do you mostly relate to?

Heavy in Your Arms

This song from Florence + the Machine really stood out to me, not just because it is beautiful and her voice is simply mesmerizing, but because the lyrics reminded me a lot of myself when I first started dating Alexander (now my husband). Now, I’m not sure if this song is about her being in a relationship she never wanted to be in, since she says “this will be my last confession I love you never felt like any blessing” and it was a relationship doomed from the start since it was a burden for both of them to be in love with each other, but here is my interpretation. I see this song as a woman who is heavy to her beloved because she is testing his strength.

Here are the lyrics:

I was a heavy heart to carry
My beloved was weighed down
My arms around his neck
My fingers laced to crown.

I was a heavy heart to carry
My feet dragged across ground
And he took me to the river
Where he slowly let me drown

My love has concrete feet
My love’s an iron ball
Wrapped around your ankles
Over the waterfall

I’m so heavy, heavy
Heavy in your arms
I’m so heavy, heavy
Heavy in your arms

And is it worth the wait
All this killing time?
Are you strong enough to stand
Protecting both your heart and mine?

heavy_in_your_armsWho is the betrayer?
Who’s the killer in the crowd?
The one who creeps in corridors
And doesn’t make a sound

My love has concrete feet
My love’s an iron ball
Wrapped around your ankles
Over the waterfall

This will be my last confession
I love you never felt like any blessing
Whispering like it’s a secret
Only to condemn the one who hears it
With a heavy heart

I was a heavy heart to carry
my beloved was weighed down
My arms around his neck
My fingers laced to crown

I was a heavy heart to carry
But he never let me down
When he had me in his arms
My feet never touched the ground

Since I grew up without a dad and saw that most of my aunts were either divorced or widowed (and seemed perfectly fine with this) the message sent to me as a kid was that men were a) not to be trusted, b) not needed or c) a burden. The only stable man in my life was my uncle Larry, who treated my sister and I as if we were his own daughters. Throughout high school and the beginning of college I had dated here and there, but very casually. Xander was my first real boyfriend. At first, everything was fine. It was all very new to me and it was a lot of fun being someone’s girlfriend. However, as time went on, and things were becoming more serious, I subconsciously put Xander to the test. I had to make sure that he was “not like the rest”. From what I could understand based on my family situation, men were not to be trusted and could very easily abandon you. That was the message my dad had sent me. You are not important enough to stick around for. You are not important enough to build a relationship with. So, naturally, I had to see if Xander was going to do this to me as well. I would say that in the first 2-3 years of our relationship it was the most challenging, since pretty much the whole time I would do or say things (really mean things at times) to see what his reaction would be. It really confused me that he wouldn’t leave me. I was like, Seriously, I’m not worth it, can’t you see?! (Of course, I wasn’t doing this consciously, only now when I look back can I see why I did everything that I did.) It also helped me realize how I felt about my own relationship with God. Seeing Xander’s unfailing and unwavering love for me reminded me that this is exactly how God is in my life. No matter how many times I tested Him, left Him, forsaked Him or yelled at Him, He is always there. It was a beautiful moment when I realized that I was unconditionally loved, not just from Alexander but from God as well.

“Are you strong enough to stand, protecting both your heart and mine?” Love is a huge risk. You have to trust that the other person you are pouring your heart and soul to is going to accept you for who you are. Alexander had just gotten out of an emotionally scarring relationship and had to trust that I wasn’t going to do what his previous girlfriend did to him. Through all my testing, I was basically asking him if he was strong enough to protect both our hearts. He had to be the strong one for us, otherwise we would never have worked out. And so, the beginning of our relationship was Alexander doing his best to carry my heavy heart. He never let me go as I dragged my feet across the ground, didn’t unlace my fingers that crowned his neck, and he never let my feet touch the ground. (And I am very glad he didn’t!)

As our relationship continued and I realized that I was obviously not getting rid of this beautiful man, I began to let my guard down and fully trust that he wasn’t going to be like all other men. I began to see that I was worth it, that it is possible for someone (especially a man) to love me unconditionally.

Do you have a heavy heart? I’m not going to lie, it is pretty damn difficult to fully trust someone with your heart, especially if you have been burned before. One thing that you can always, always trust in, is that God loves you unconditionally. He doesn’t care about all the other stuff, how many times you have spit in his face, how many times you told him you didn’t need him, He is still carrying you and will never let your feet touch the ground. Your love doesn’t need to be an iron ball or have your feet made out of concrete. With other people, yes. That’s why God tells us to above all else, guard your hearts, because he knows how delicate and fragile it is. My heart was guarded to the max when it didn’t need to be, because time and time again Alexander proved that he was a solid guy who had no intention of leaving me.

Perhaps this is why I am so infatuated when men carry women (without struggling of course). Every time I would read about it in a novel or see it in a movie, my heart would give a little sigh and I would picture the day when my handsome strong prince was going to lift me from the ground effortlessly and carry me home. There is something incredibly sexy when a man is strong enough to carry his woman, not just physically but emotionally as well. Let’s face it girls, we are pretty crazy. Emotions run high and we are weary of giving up our hearts so easily. For a man to be willing to carry a woman despite all her baggage, or how much she may be dead weighting to test his strength, is a beautiful picture to me. I applaud all men out there who have carried their women’s heavy hearts and patiently waited for them to trust in their strength.

(Today, the only reason why Alexander struggles to carry me is because I weigh a bagillion pounds. It’s back to the gym I go!)

I love this song so much that I will even forgive Florence for letting them use it in the awful Twilight movie, Eclipse.

Switchfoot’s “Mess of Me” VS Lady Gaga’s “Born this Way”

I am sure that 99% of the people reading this blog post have heard the song “Born this Way” by Lady Gaga. Maybe 25% of you have listened to the Switchfoot song, “Mess of Me.” I actually just listened to this song not too long ago, and I couldn’t help but compare this song to Gaga’s Born this Way, solely due to the fact that they hold completely opposite mentalities. One song recognizes that the human heart is inherently wicked and that we have all made a mess of ourselves, needing some kind of redemption. The other song says, “I was born perfectly. I have no flaws, I am beautiful doing whatever it is I want to do or want to be.” Of course, most people who hear both these songs will naturally flock to the upbeat pop song that Lady Gaga created (in 10 minutes apparently) and love hearing that they shouldn’t feel any guilt at all for who they are, because A) they were born this way and B) God doesn’t make any mistakes, because He was the one who made you this particular way.

Compare the lyrics:

Switchfoot “Mess of Me”

I am my own affliction
I am my own disease
There ain’t no drug that they could sell
Ah, there ain’t no drug to make me well

I made a mess of me
I wanna get back the rest of me
I made a mess of me
I wanna spend the rest of my life alive

I made a mess of me
I wanna get back the rest of me
I made a mess of me
I wanna spend the rest of my life alive
The rest of my life alive

We lock our souls in cages
We hide inside our shells
It’s hard to free the ones you love
Oh, when you can’t forgive yourself
Yeah, forgive yourself

switchfoot_gagaLady Gaga “Born this Way”

It doesn’t matter if you love him or capital H-I-M
Just put your paws up
‘Cause you were born this way, baby

My mama told me when I was young
We are all born superstars
She rolled my hair and put my lipstick on
In the glass of her boudoir

There’s nothin’ wrong with lovin’ who you are
She said, ’cause He made you perfect, babe
So hold your head up, girl and you you’ll go far
Listen to me when I say

I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way

Don’t hide yourself in regret
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born this way, born this way

Give yourself prudence and love your friends
Subway kid, rejoice of truth
In the religion of the insecure
I must be myself, respect my youth

A different lover is not a sin
Believe capital H-I-M
I love my life, I love this record and
Mi amore vole fe yah

Don’t be drag, just be a queen
Whether you’re broke or evergreen
You’re black, white, beige, chola descent
You’re Lebanese, you’re orient

Whether life’s disabilities
Left you outcast, bullied or teased
Rejoice and love yourself today
‘Cause baby, you were born this way

No matter gay, straight or bi
Lesbian, transgendered life
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born to survive

No matter black, white or beige
Chola or orient made
I’m on the right track, baby
I was born to be brave

This is what Switchfoot’s message is with their song: We are a fallen human race. We have made a mess of ourselves. Just take a look at the horror and evil you see in this world. Rape, murder, genocide, pedophilia, etc. These are PEOPLE doing these things. Is Lady Gaga talking about those people too?Where does the line get drawn? Oh, rapist, just enjoy and love yourself today, cause baby you were born this way. Oh, pedophile, you go on ahead and love on those little kids, because God made you this way, and you enjoy it! Here is the truth guys. We are ALL a fallen people, every single one of us. Do you think that you are inherently a good person? Maybe you are a law abiding citizen, help out in some charities, and live your life not getting into anyone else’s business. Do we really, in the depth of our hearts and souls, think that we are a model standard of everything that is good in this world?

What would you do if you were put in a situation where food was scarce, you were driven mad with hunger and there was a child who had just snagged a bagel and was eating it in front of you? Would you sit next to that kid, pat his head, and be like “You enjoy that bagel, kid.” Maybe a few of you would. But most would either A) think about stealing it or B) steal it. My point is, at our core, we are not a perfect human race. We have plenty of flaws, so bad in fact, that we can’t even fathom some of the things we read or see on the news. And what is bad? How do we know that certain things are evil? Everyone can agree that murdering babies is wrong. (If someone doesn’t think that’s wrong then something is wrong with them). What makes it wrong? Is it just your opinion? If that is wrong, then what is right? Do we have a standard of something that is completely and perfectly good? Yes, I believe we do. I don’t believe that science or natural selection could provide humans with the sense of morality that we have. If this standard of ultimate good comes from God, then I believe Him when He tells us what is best for us, and what actions we should stay away from. He is the creator of the universe–I think He knows what He is talking about. Gaga is right. We are born this way, born with sin. No one is righteous except Him. Only when we realize how much of a mess we are, how we cannot keep living in this life trying to do things our way, can He begin working in our lives. In “Mess of Me,” the artists are saying to recognize that first, you are a mess, and second you are in need of some desperate help. They also say that once you realize this, you need to forgive yourself. This means you don’t live the rest of your life in guilt. You have been freed, knowing that you have been forgiven by the God that created you and loves you. You have been redeemed. I am not saying in any way, to think less of yourself constantly so that God can work more in you. I am not saying that he wants us to live life with low self esteem. On the contrary, I am saying to have a realistic idea of who you are, only then can you live a freeing life.

I love this quote, “The answer to “low self-esteem” is to understand that we do not DESERVE anything because we, in and of ourselves, are worthless. Yet, because the God of the universe has chosen to love us and redeem us with His very life, we have gained a value that is beyond compare. Knowing we are worthless humbles us before God and allows us to appreciate His grace and love, which are given to us even though we don’t deserve them. Knowing we are loved by God and redeemed by His blood, we see the value of each and every soul on this earth.”

Maybe Lady Gaga’s intention with this song was to celebrate how diverse we all are and that we should appreciate our unique personalities and talents that God has given us. I think she sincerely wants to have everyone love each other for who they are. I don’t have a problem with that. I do believe that we do need to love everyone. Jesus in the New Testament told us to love one another over 20 times. (And he did mean everyone.) Love isn’t the issue here. I believe Lady Gaga’s main (maybe a bit more discreet) message is that you should love who you are because you were born a certain way. I believe she specifically wants to address homosexuals with her song. Now, I am not going to dive too deeply in this, let me just say that it is uncommon for scientists to think that homosexuality is solely genetic. There are many factors as to why someone is homosexual. But even if it was, I would say, so what? Does that automatically mean it is morally appropriate? Yes, there are those who are genetically predisposed to be an alcoholic when they grow up. Do we still condone the act? There are those who are predisposed to become a sexual addict. Do we approve of that just because they were born that way? To learn more about this, click here.

Check out what this Denny Burk, dean of Boyce College and associate professor of New Testament , says about Lady Gaga’s understanding of being “born this way:”

.. It is true that God created human beings in His own image and that as a result every single human has intrinsic value and worth (Genesis 1:26-27). It is not true, however, that God endorses every thought and intention of the human heart. We live in a Genesis 3 world in which humanity and the cosmos are fallen and compromised by sin. That means that some of our desires are misdirected — even some of the ones that we are born with. That we desire sin from birth is not a cause for celebratory anthems but an indication of just how desperate the human condition really is (Psalm 51:5; 58:3; Jeremiah 17:9).

What kind of outlook do you have? Do you agree with the fact that we as a human race have made a mess of ourselves, or do you think that we all ought to accept the way we are because we are born this way?

“I’m ready now I’m not waiting for the afterlife”

I recently listened to Switchfoot’s new CD “Vice Verses” and there were so many songs on there that I immediately related to and wanted to share with you. I really appreciate deep and meaningful lyrics, so I wanted to reflect on these and share my own thoughts and opinions on their songs. This first song is called “Afterlife.”

I’ve tasted fire I’m ready to come alive
I can’t just shut it up and fake that I’m alright
I’m ready now
I’m not waiting for the afterlife

I’ll Let it burn the way the sunlight burns my skin
The way I feel inside, the way the day begins
I’m ready now
I’m not waiting for the other side
I’m ready now, I’m ready now

afterlifeCause everyday the world is made
A chance to change But I feel the same
And I wonder
Why would I wait till I die to come alive?
I’m ready now
I’m not waiting for the afterlife

I still believe we could live forever
You and I we begin forever now
Forever now

“I wonder why would I wait till I die to come alive.” I don’t know about you, but sometimes I feel as if I will only truly feel alive when I’m in heaven. As a result, I am subconsciously going through my life not living to my fullest extent, thinking that it will only come when I leave this world. I think that only when I am in heaven can I do all the things I’ve always dreamed of doing. Sometimes I think that the world isn’t good enough for me. This world is filled with pain, disappointment, sorrow, evil, greed, sometimes mediocrity. I loved reading adventure romance novels and watching movies all my life because it took me to another world that would always involve some kind of adventure, a dashing man to share that with me, some huge challenge we would need to overcome, and then marriage of course. But then the story ends. What happens after marriage? Most of the books and movies end once the couple decides to be together forever. Are they telling us that life is over once you get married? I never got to experience my storybook adventure romance novel and now I am married. So…now what? Is that the end for me? Did I really think that this story would happen to me in real life? No, not really. Maybe a little piece of me thought that one day I could finally have the story I always dreamed about, but I knew the chances of that happening are slim to none. How much of this though, is my own fault? How could I have been living my life now had I made different decisions? Perhaps take more risks, meet more people, live in a different country, etc.? How many opportunities did I miss out on because I have this thought in the back of my mind that my life CAN’T be lived to the fullest because my perfect story could only happen in a perfect place like heaven? Now, I’m not saying that all Christians are like me. Most of you know how to live life. You go on adventures, travel across the world, live in other countries, meet the craziest kinds of people, whatever. Good for you. I just hope that after you do all those things, you don’t feel an emptiness inside. Because we weren’t made to live life to the fullest in just the physical sense. If you do, you are just going through the motions trying to satiate the hunger inside begging for satisfaction. It is only by having satisfaction in Him first that you can fully enjoy other aspects of life.

The more I am learning God’s word, the more I am realizing how much God wants us to be fully alive in this world. Check out what Jesus says about His reason for coming to the world, “”I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 This verse is talking about living life to the fullest, not just in the physical world but spiritually as well. It is only when we can combine these two with God’s will that we can experience an abundant life. He did not put us on this world to just “work for the weekend,” come home every night to watch TV and browse the internet, and to wonder when will be the next time you go on vacation.

Cause everyday the world is made
A chance to change But I feel the same

Everyday we are choosing our fate with every decision we make. That, I believe, is the hardest part. Making that change. We say that we want to change. People can give eloquent speeches on how much change should be made, but it all starts inside. With our hearts, souls, minds.

Are you ready now? I am. I am so sick of the same old thing everyday. I don’t want to live my whole week excited for my weekend. My story isn’t over. I believe that I first need to change my outlook on life, realize that I was put on this earth for a purpose, to glorify God through the talents He has given me, and to finally take action. I’m ready now, I’m not waiting for the afterlife.